So I am off to Boys' Camp next week at Pioneer Pacific on Thetis Island - me incarcerated on a small island with many many young boys. Much of the leadership comes from St. Philip's. My role is called "staff support." Others will entertain the screaming energetic pre-adolescent and adolescent young men. But, even so, it is not entirely my natural environment. I went to Boys' Camp (not Pioneer) twice, when I was small; the memory still fills me with terror.
I am talking this Sunday in my sermon, just before leaving for camp, about fear. How appropriate. Boys' Camp for me as a child was a frightening experience. I was small, sensitive, quiet, introverted - the perfect vicitm for the wild anarchic energy of Boys' Camp. It seemed to me at the time, that I was always one step away from disaster. I tried to compete, tried to be tough, tried to keep up. But everything about Boys' Camp left me behind. I spent my nights fearing the approach of each new day.
What is it we fear? What would our lives be like if we could live without fear? What might the world be like if we were not afraid of one another, if we were able to live without feeling the need to protect ourselves against the antagonistic forces of the world that seem so often to be organized against us?
Jesus found his followers in a boat in a storm cast about by the waves. They were terrified and "cried out in fear." (Matthew 14:26) Jesus said to them, "Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid." (Matthew 14:27) When we find ourselves fearful, the answer is not to work harder to bring the forces of life under our control. The answer is to "take heart." We need to find that place within ourselves where we can know "It is I." We are not alone. Jesus is with us. There is a strength, a wisdom, a power of life that dwells in our being. We name this power "Christ" and affirm that this presence is always with us and will never let us down no matter what may be happening in the circumstances of our lives.
Experiences like my time as a child at Boys' Camp, occur in our lives to bring us to that place where, along with Peter who in a moment of courage stepped out of the boat to meet Jesus, became overwhelmed and cried out "Lord, save me!" (Matthew 14:30) This is the prayer God loves to answer. This is the prayer that declares, I know I cannot do this thing called life on my own. I know that there will always be forces at work in the world that I experience as hostile and threatening. But as soon as I open myself to the reality of God's presence, I also know that Jesus will immediately reach out his hand and catch me. I am held; the forces of life I experience as threatening, are nothing compared to the force and power of love that dwells within me in the person of the Christ who saves!
Perhaps, as I journey through this week of Boys' Camp, I can hold this strength and be a reminder to others that the presence within them is greater and stronger and more real than any presence that may seem to threaten or intimidate. This is my prayer.
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Showing posts with label courage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label courage. Show all posts
August 7, 2008
August 6, 2008
new blog
So Ernest just set me up with this space in the blog world. He showed me how to access my new blog space and how to put up a post. As he concluded he said, "So, there you go. You have a blank canvas."
The "blank canvas" is the most terrifying part of any creative process. You stand poised on the edge of an abyss. You look over into the vast empty space and ask yourself "Is there anything there?" "Do I have anything to say?" The longer you ask the question, the less you will create. The creative process starts with a single step in which you open yourself to the empty space and allow whatever is within you to flow out into that space.
I am tempted to give in to my fear. I am tempted to fill the empty space too quickly. It is hard to sit with the uncertainty and doubt of a "blank canvas." Space is so threatening. Uncertainty makes me so uneasy. I am inclined to rush in with something, anything that will distract me from being in this uneasy place between the moment of facing the "blank canvas" and the moment when something begins to emerge. Sometimes the first step is terribly dramatic. Usually it is more ordinary. I start to type. I put a paintbrush into the first colour. I put my hands on the unformed lump of clay. The critical voice in my head falls silent for a second and a flow of light and life begins to emerge.
This "flow" is source of all life. There is an energy to existence that I can acknowledge and enter or deny and reject. When I enter the flow of life, I join the rhythm of the cosmos and find myself in the depths of God. There is a flow that will carry me, if I am willing to let go of all those heavy obstacles that so often weigh me down.
Jesus lived in this flow. He seems to have had an unerring sense of what was the next thing to do, where was the next place to go, who was the next person to whom he needed to relate. The question is, can I be as open as Jesus to the flow and energy of God? Am I willing to surrender those things that hinder me and inhibit my walking freely in the light and truth that is God?
Jesus' first disciples wanted to know "'Rabbi' (which translated means Teacher), 'where are you staying?'" (John 1:38b) In response Jesus did not point them in the right direction. He did not give them a map. Jesus replied, "'Come and see.'" (John 1:39) To live is to "Come and see." We must be willing to move. We need to go from here to there and then on to the next place. Nothing is ever fixed. The creative process that is our lives begins with our willingness to take the first step. We never know what step number two is going to look like, and certainly have no idea what steps number three and four will entail. All we can know for sure is that if we take step number one with openenness and willingness, we will be prepared for whatever is needed when it comes time to take step number two and the one after that and after that.
I want to walk with courage. I want to be willing to follow wherever Jesus might lead. I do not want to be locked into some predetermined vision of what life must look like. I want to enter the flow and follow wherever the wind might lead. Jesus did not promise that I would always understand or be able to see where the path of life was leading. Jesus promised, "The wind blows where it chooses, and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it goes. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." (John 3:8)
Bruce and Sharon have just returned from walking the Santiago Trail. Sharon tells me that all along the trail there are little markers to guide the walkers. Sometimes they had to look carefully to see the marker and there were times when they were hardly able to discern which was the right path to follow. But eventually they would always find a smal sign placed there to guide each walker. Our markers are seldom that clear. But for each of us there is a path. As we trust the process and stay open to life and God's presence in life, we will know the path that is ordained for us and live in the flow of God's Spirit.
Perhaps launching "A Spacious Place," is the flow for me at the moment. Only hindsight will tell. In the meantime, I will put one foot in front of the other and see where the path wants to go.
Read more...
The "blank canvas" is the most terrifying part of any creative process. You stand poised on the edge of an abyss. You look over into the vast empty space and ask yourself "Is there anything there?" "Do I have anything to say?" The longer you ask the question, the less you will create. The creative process starts with a single step in which you open yourself to the empty space and allow whatever is within you to flow out into that space.
I am tempted to give in to my fear. I am tempted to fill the empty space too quickly. It is hard to sit with the uncertainty and doubt of a "blank canvas." Space is so threatening. Uncertainty makes me so uneasy. I am inclined to rush in with something, anything that will distract me from being in this uneasy place between the moment of facing the "blank canvas" and the moment when something begins to emerge. Sometimes the first step is terribly dramatic. Usually it is more ordinary. I start to type. I put a paintbrush into the first colour. I put my hands on the unformed lump of clay. The critical voice in my head falls silent for a second and a flow of light and life begins to emerge.
This "flow" is source of all life. There is an energy to existence that I can acknowledge and enter or deny and reject. When I enter the flow of life, I join the rhythm of the cosmos and find myself in the depths of God. There is a flow that will carry me, if I am willing to let go of all those heavy obstacles that so often weigh me down.
Jesus lived in this flow. He seems to have had an unerring sense of what was the next thing to do, where was the next place to go, who was the next person to whom he needed to relate. The question is, can I be as open as Jesus to the flow and energy of God? Am I willing to surrender those things that hinder me and inhibit my walking freely in the light and truth that is God?
Jesus' first disciples wanted to know "'Rabbi' (which translated means Teacher), 'where are you staying?'" (John 1:38b) In response Jesus did not point them in the right direction. He did not give them a map. Jesus replied, "'Come and see.'" (John 1:39) To live is to "Come and see." We must be willing to move. We need to go from here to there and then on to the next place. Nothing is ever fixed. The creative process that is our lives begins with our willingness to take the first step. We never know what step number two is going to look like, and certainly have no idea what steps number three and four will entail. All we can know for sure is that if we take step number one with openenness and willingness, we will be prepared for whatever is needed when it comes time to take step number two and the one after that and after that.
I want to walk with courage. I want to be willing to follow wherever Jesus might lead. I do not want to be locked into some predetermined vision of what life must look like. I want to enter the flow and follow wherever the wind might lead. Jesus did not promise that I would always understand or be able to see where the path of life was leading. Jesus promised, "The wind blows where it chooses, and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it goes. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." (John 3:8)
Bruce and Sharon have just returned from walking the Santiago Trail. Sharon tells me that all along the trail there are little markers to guide the walkers. Sometimes they had to look carefully to see the marker and there were times when they were hardly able to discern which was the right path to follow. But eventually they would always find a smal sign placed there to guide each walker. Our markers are seldom that clear. But for each of us there is a path. As we trust the process and stay open to life and God's presence in life, we will know the path that is ordained for us and live in the flow of God's Spirit.
Perhaps launching "A Spacious Place," is the flow for me at the moment. Only hindsight will tell. In the meantime, I will put one foot in front of the other and see where the path wants to go.
Read more...
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